My top 10 Instagram posts so far
I was just looking at my old posts and getting nostalgic about how non-conformist I used to be, before the Instagram algorithm incentivized me to adopt all of the stylistic tropes influencer photos. My glory days are gone! But I can still look fondly back on them, so here are my top 10 Instagram posts.
10. When I tragically lost my card holder while teaching my fans how to pose for pictures '
For so long, I could barely even look at this video, which shows the exact moment my card holder was lost. It is so tragic.
9. When I called out pasty white instagrammers for airbrushing their splotchy legs
If you are pale AF your legs are going to be tie-dye, not monochrome. Everyone knows, so stop lying.
8. When I spoke candidly about my Berghain rejection (which was 100% not my fault, since the bouncer was going to let me in alone!)
Getting rejected from Berghain, the world’s most exclusive club, was really hard for me. Even though I wasn’t the one rejected, and I didn’t know I was going clubbing and so didn’t plan my outfit, I still conceive of myself as someone who is always club ready, and who is charismatic enough to make up for the lacking outfits of my friends. I think I emerged from the rejection stronger though
7. When I bravely confessed that I am not a mortal, but a mythical creature
After hiding my true self for so long, being honest about my non-mortality was so challenging. But I felt so freed afterwards, and wore my hair in its incandescent-glow setting for weeks. Ultimately I got bored and wanted to blend in as human again—some of my newer fans don’t even know I’m a mythical creature—but I’m still proud of this milestone again.
6. All of the posts where I called out the celebrities who copied my outfits!
Honesty is so important on social media.
5. When I used the 10-year challenge to come clean about the work I’ve had done on my face: no work at all
A comparison with photos from my childhood, as well as some newer photos which show I clearly peaked around 2012, are evidence that I have had no work done on my face. There’s nothing wrong with having work done, but you have to be honest about it.
4. This pic of me wearing so many couture brands!
It’s an unspoken rule of influencers and celebs that you want to have as many designer labels showing at once. I think this is a personal record for me, so I’m very proud. I even did a tutorial about how to make LV slippers!
3. When I used the hype surrounding the Fyre festival documentaries to raise awareness about water
Andy King almost having to S a D for some Evian was one of the biggest recent moments in the history of water. I used it to send my own message.
2. This meme about my struggle with having so many Chanel bags
The struggle is so real!
1. My amazing Coachella post with this camel!
I mean, this post didn’t have much of a positive effect on the world but I just love it so much, especially this amazing camel I made friends with in the desert. How majestic?!